About

About the Blog: A note from the author

This blog is about a personal journey in healing from sexual abuse and domestic violence.  This blog is not a professional site.  I am not a trained psychologist, and while I have done quite a bit of research in the field of psychology and healing from abuse, it is more personal experience that fuels this blog.  Each post is based on my own experiences, emotions, advice, and counseling that I have found personally fulfilling/helpful.  This is not a prescription or a diagnosis for anyone by any means.  On articles that are more scientifically based, however, I will provide a list of sources at the end and leave the fact-checking to you.

I am not a perfect person, and my path does not fit everyone’s needs.  I am still finding healing myself.  Still searching for a peace of mind after what happened to me.

That being said, I do hope this blog can help those who have experienced the same or similar things as myself.  I hope it brings you hope.  I hope it leads to healing.  I hope it makes you realize that you are not alone.  That you will never have to be alone.  I hope it gives you strength.  And I hope that ultimately, you realize and truly understand how beautiful you are.  How amazing you are and how much you have to offer to the world.  In spite of the pain you have experienced in the past.  In spite of what has happened to you before.

So join me on my personal journey.  Share yours with me as we go along.  All I ask is that you be supportive, as much of what I will share (and what others will potentially share as well) is very sensitive and close to the heart.

With love, support, and hope,

Lauren

About the Author

Lauren Bringle, a recent graduate from the University of Texas at Austin, has spent the last few years studying Art History and French, working at the Blanton Museum of Art, and engaging in freelance writing.  Her main interests lie where people connect with their surroundings: through art, food, culture, movement, and personal relationships.  An active yoga enthusiast, Lauren is a survivor of Sexual Abuse and Domestic Violence.  She is currently forging a path to personal healing, and wants to share her journey with others.

Lauren invites all users to share comments and other content-related information on her site.  For any other questions, concerns, or comments, you may contact her directly at Lauren.bringle@gmail.com.

To see more of Lauren’s writings in other topics, see:

http://www.examiner.com/sightseeing-8-in-austin-mn/lauren-bringle

For her insights on Austin sightseeing and other travel tips as a writer for Examiner.com

http://www.thoughts.com/bringle

For her experiences dealing with culture shock and foreign mishaps, see her blog from her study abroad experience in France

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9 thoughts on “About

  1. You are a beautiful soul, Lauren! Your blogs are very well-written and inspiring! I hope you will continue writing and healing. Good luck, and keep rising! =]

    Kylie [RM]
    Founder/President
    RISE [Rape Incest & Suicide Education]

    • Thanks Kylie! I checked out your website, and keep up the good work on your end as well! These victims need to know that none of us stand alone, and there is hope for healing, so I am thankful that others are out there working towards the same goal as me; to end the violence and to heal the damage.

  2. Hi Lauren,

    Thank you for some of your beautiful posts! I enjoy my visit here. I could feel that some of your experiences resonate mine. And I think it’s one of the beauty of blogging, where we could share our experience with others. 🙂 I hope the beautiful soul you have will keep shining and encouraging towards others.

    And I noticed that you like to reflect on life. Perhaps you’d be interested in reading my flash fiction reflection? Here are the links:

    “The Scholar and the Boatman: http://subhanzein.wordpress.com/2012/02/08/the-scholar-and-the-boatman/
    “Two Rupiah Notes”: http://subhanzein.wordpress.com/2012/02/19/two-rupiah-notes/
    “Becoming Human”: http://subhanzein.wordpress.com/2012/02/26/becoming-human/
    “Chinese Bamboo and Paulo Coelho”: http://subhanzein.wordpress.com/2012/01/24/chinese-bamboo-and-paulo-coelho/
    And the latest: “Pham and Her Gold Fish” http://subhanzein.wordpress.com/2012/03/04/pham-and-her-gold-fish/

    Please feel free to have a look at them, thank you and have a great day! 🙂

    Warm regards from Down Under,

    Subhan Zein

    • Thanks for all your kind words! I really appreciate you taking the time to read my blog and I hope it helps your healing process as well. I love to write short stories also, so I’ll have to check some of yours out. Thanks again and have a wonderful day!

  3. Greetings from Pakistan,

    Dear Lauren

    LIC Ministries Pakistan is working on different projects here for the social development and religious progress in Christ. We have worked on different projects, that you can find in our website. Right now, we are beginning a small project on persecuted children. We have done some assessment programs and we found some children almost 115 to work for only in our area. For this project we are looking for some ministries to guide and support us. If you have some resources and vision to help us, please do not hesitate to discuss. I can send you the details later, after your next communication.

    I will wait for your email. God bless you richly. Amen.

    In Christ,
    Zeeshan Javed.

  4. Dear Friend, fellow Survivor, and last but not least, Lauren:

    I have read plenty of your posts tonight since I stumbled across your blog. What I have come to notice is we have a lot in common and the effects of sexual abuse has had a huge impact on both of us. I am still fighting the feelings of guilt, poor self esteem, and image. It affects all of my relationships, especially with my girlfriend. You seem to have made leaps and bounds in your recovery, and I’m continuously finding more and more struggles and ways to be critical of myself and how things “should have” gone. But feel free to follow my blog as well, and I wish you much healing on your way, and keep helping people, you do it well.

    Stay Blessed

    • Thanks so much for your kind words and for reading! It can be so difficult, I know, to stop criticizing ourselves. Especially when, as survivors of abuse, we are generally trained to criticize ourselves. Best of luck during your recovery process, keep your chin up and keep healing!

  5. Hi Lauren
    I’m a survivor of sexual as well as physical and mental abuse ,I’m now 17 the first time I’ve ever been abused was at the age 5 ,but the sexual abuse didn’t occur until the age of 13 .Have been struggling for the past years with this unfortunately I’m still under the same roof as my main abuser and been wanting leave since ,but I fear for my siblings so I stay to watch over them.I say that the hardest thing for me was when I told my mom ,she cried and then her and my other abusers put me through a longer period of questioning .the worst part is when my mom later promised me that we would leave my stepfather ,and here I am now still under the same roof . I can say that the main pain I have is the fact that I feel as though my mom chose her husband over me ,there was times I tried to ignore it but ,in a weird twisted timing a show air subject would come up about the topic.which would always cause me to cry ,I tried to do counselling but my mom was to scared of him getting taken away.I tried numerous of times to talk to her about it and she gets upset and tells me things like that if she such a bad mother why don’t she just leave or I leave .I love my mother and I know it hurts her to ,so I just tried to in a sense get over this. It affected my self-esteem to the point of can’t even look at my self in the mirror ,got to school ,or walk outside my house.I just hated myself .then I finally came to the conclusion that I wasn’t going to be hurt anymore so I ,put it to the back of my mind.it wasn’t until the age of 14 when I made the self discovery that I was gay and just like that everything stopped . I became happier and felt safer as well , I’m doing a whole lot better now, but there still a few things that concern me.should I report him ,how can I continue to protect my siblings , and is it ever to late to bring this up? And I got to admit that I find my self wondering was it my fault ,and what have happened if I would have to action and called the police? This is also one the biggest I wanted just get off my chest because I find holding things only hurt you more. Anyways thank you for your time and information sorry if this is ,filled with terrible grammar.
    wish you the best.

    • Hi Tye,

      First of all, I’m so SO sorry to hear that this is your current situation! It sounds like a horrible, terrible, no-fun situation to feel stuck in :(. Someone else making the decision and taking the action to abuse you is definitely NOT your fault! Again, you are NOT at fault or to blame for a cruel person hurting you!! Do you ask them to hit/hurt you? Do you ask them to say horrible things to you? Are you able to control another person’s actions? The answer to all of these questions is certainly not! Each person is in charge of their own thoughts, actions and words, and I’m so sorry to hear that your mother and her husband have made such poor choices :(.

      Unfortunately, we cannot control how other people react/respond, only how WE ourselves react and respond. I would definitely recommend you talk to a counselor if possible, as they would be better able to assist you with the specific actions to take better than I can. Do you have a personal cell phone, or a friend’s phone you could borrow? If so, I recommend you find a time to be alone, away from your house and try calling a hotline for advice. There are all sorts of hotlines you can call. I would try the National Domestic Violence Hotline, phone number is: 1-800-799-7233.

      Aside from that, it sounds to me like the most important thing to do right now is to secure your personal health and safety. I understand that you are frightened for your siblings and that the situation can be complicated. However, the only way to really and truly help them is to get to a place where you can help yourself first. It’s like the flight attendants on airplanes always say, in case of an emergency, put the oxygen mask on yourself FIRST. You need to have the space and the ability to breathe and recover in order to guide your siblings to a healthy place too. I experienced this type of guilt with my sister as well growing up and it is a hard choice to make.

      Next I would say find a support group. This was BY FAR the most important step for me in my recovery. And the good news is, it is NEVER TOO LATE to start recovering! I didn’t start my recovery journey until I was 23 years old and I know women much older than me (even in their 50s) who have JUST started their own healing journeys! And the best part is, despite what some people say, life CAN get a lot better as you age!! :). Can you join a club at school or a church group or a sports team and meet supportive friends in a positive environment? Can you start taking yoga classes or dance classes or horseback riding lessons or art lessons or whatever else you might connect with, that can also get you out of the house and away from the abuse more? Or even get a part-time job or volunteer somewhere, like a museum or something? That way you can get out of the house AND it looks good on a resume/college application later :).

      I know it can be scary to strike out on your own (BELIEVE me, I’ve been there!) and it can take a while to heal but it is so so SO worth it in the end!! Do you have relatives who are safe and loving that you could stay with for awhile? Perhaps even out-of-state relatives and just pitch the idea as you’ve always wanted to travel somewhere else? Do you have a mentor or a teacher or someone else you could confide in? If you don’t feel comfortable about going to the police, then I recommend you find some support group, whatever it may be or look like and find someone to talk to!

      Right now, it doesn’t seem like talking about it with your mom is helping you, so I recommend you find someone else who you CAN talk to about it. Someone safe and trustworthy and if possible, someone who is removed from the situation and not directly in your house/connected with your mom and stepdad.

      Feel free to contact me any time with questions, you can email me as well if you’d like. I really hope this helps and I’m happy to help in any way I can! I’ll definitely keep you in my thoughts and you definitely have my best wishes and hope for your future and your healing journey! Best of luck and hope to hear from you soon! – Lauren

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